Yesterday was another day of questions from the boys. They seem to go in spurts. My kids sure do ask the hard ones. And they really don't like the round about answers, they want nothing but the facts.
So we are sitting watching t.v. and out of nowhere #2 says "so do we have to find a new dad now"? I tell him of course not. Their dad was in love with them before they ever met. He chose to be their dad and while they have their "uncles", grandpa and friends they will always have their dad even though he is gone. Then #3 says something about me being old and alone. I tell him that is okay. I love their dad and in my heart we are married and I would have never dated while he was here so I am not interested in dating now. I told them who knows about the future, I surely dont. If I ever do date it would not for one moment mean that I dont still love their dad because I will love him and cherrish him until the day I die. We talk about a few more little things then BAM #2 has another toughie. He says, so this means #4 will never call anyone dad? I say no. He will call dad his dad. It is true that he will never have a physical person to call his dad but that is why we need to tell him the stories and keep dad fresh in all of our minds so that #4 knows him the way we did. His response, that sucks and its not fair. I tell him of course it's not fair but that is our lives and we have to make the best of it.